I Write funny things

Narrative

TOONMATES (½-hour, Animated/Live-Action)
It's a dream come true when flesh-and-blood fanboy Alex Kepple moves in with cartoon former child star Roy Thompson. Now, he just has to hide that his family is gentrifying the toon town he now calls home.

Featured on The Red List from Coverfly

Semifinalist, ScreenCraft Screenwriting Fellowship 2022

Semifinalist, ScreenCraft Comedy Competition 2021

Second Rounder, Launch Pad Pilot Competition 9th Annual

CHAMBERMAID (½-hour, Live-Action Fantasy)
A young servant and her fellow retainers must keep a castle running amid coups, wars, and extreme office politics in this series that answers the question: “Who has to clean up after The Red Wedding?”

Second Rounder, Austin Film Festival

LORD CHAMBERLAIN’S MEN (Feature, Historical Heist Comedy)
After their landlord refuses to extend the lease on their theater, William Shakespeare and his acting company decide to steal the entire building plank-by-plank and relocate it to secure a future for their creative work

Quarterfinalist, Emerging Screenwriters - Genre Screenplay Competition 2020

ARCHENEMY (Hour, Young Adult Superhero)
Stuart Stevens is sure that he’s going to become a superhero when he’s audience to a science experiment gone wrong. But when his jock former best friend saves him and gets superpowers from the accident, Stuart decides to become a supervillain and take back the powers that are rightfully his.

HUMOR

Here are some of my favorite articles I’ve written for Hard Drive.

See them all HERE

  • Opinion: We Must Redistribute the Banana Wealth in This Donkey Kong Country (by King K. Rool)

    • “Komrades, the time has come to seize what is rightfully ours. This crumbling banana republic can stand no more. It’s time to spread our wealth around and use it for projects that benefit the entire community, like a giant island in the shape of my head that has a laser inside called the “Blast-O-Matic.” And even though it will be shaped like my head, it belongs to all of us. And we shall use it to crush these Kong capitalists once and for all.”

  • Secret Facility Holding Ape Captive Has Another Great Day Where Nothing Goes Wrong

    • Sponsored Post for Devolver Digital

    • “Another beautiful day in paradise!” said security guard Anna Dimitrova as she clocked into her shift. “This is the greatest job I’ve ever had. The people are great, the benefits are second-to-none, and there are always the best snacks in the break room. And don’t tell my boss this, but the job is so easy. I just have to make sure the Ape we have locked up doesn’t break out, which is impossible.”

      “We’ve been calling this place Ape In,” Dimitrova added. “On account of the fact that there’s an ape that’s always in a cage!”

  • GUIDE: Here’s All the Blue Coin Locations in Yellowstone National Park

    • “Hayden Valley is a great spot to see some of Yellowstone’s magnificent wildlife and restock your crafting materials. The Blue Coin here will reveal itself after you defeat 50 Bison. We recommend equipping the Yellowstone Spirit of the West Burgundy Hoodie for its +2 bonus to Perception and Small Guns.”

NON-FICTION